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Buying a New Can Opener: What You Need to Know

Everyone needs a can opener!

This is especially true for those starting out on their own and slowing building up their kitchen toolbox. If you’ve never owned a can opener and you’re on the fence about purchasing one, then you’ve probably been taking can openers for granted all your life. It doesn’t matter how rarely you actually cook, there’s going to come a time when you’re going to wish you had a can opener of your own. You don’t want to be heating baked beans for dinner on a lonely Friday night and suddenly find yourself without a can-opening instrument of some kind. When life hands you a can, be prepared and have a good can opener. Read on for the Content Bash guide to purchasing a quality can opener.

A Brief History of Can Openers.

We have been keeping our food in tin cans since around 1772, when the Dutch Navy started storing smoked salmon in boxes of tin. By 1822, canning food was a thing in the United States, but crazy enough, the first can opener was not patented for another thirty years until 1855. For decades, people did whatever they had to do to get to the food inside of the can. Like so many monkeys banging so many coconuts on so many rocks, we scratched, clawed, pried, dug, tore, mauled, cut, hacked, pulled, and threw our cans using what little modern tools we had. 

The future of opening cans got much brighter in 1870, when unsung pewtersmith hero William Lyman invented the first can opener with a rotating wheel. But his method involved the pain in the ass of piercing the can first and rotating the cutting wheel around the rim of the can with the help of a big-ass lever. Fortunately, the Star Can Opener Company improved his method in 1925 by adding a second rotating wheel that gripped the edge of the can better. This new version allowed enthusiastic can-openers to open and grip the can at the same time. This is the modern can opener as we know it today.  

Things to Know Before You Buy a Can Opener!

Now that you have a newfound respect for opening cans, perhaps you’ll be considering your can opener needs more seriously. But there’s still a lot of important things you should be aware of before you just walk down to your local can opener store and buy the first model you see. 

Dogs can’t use can openers.

While sea otters and dolphins are known mammals with evolved tool skills, dogs are not quite there yet. If you plan on purchasing a can opener for the primary purpose of feeding your pet, understand that you will often have to do the actual can-opening yourself.  

There are left-handed can openers available.

Southpaws without a Flanders Leftorium in their town will be heartened to learn that they don’t have to settle for a right-handed can opener in the cruel right-handed world they’re living in. What a time to be alive! Whether you’re shopping online or at a retail location, don’t forget about the many left-handed models that are available to consumers. If your local Target or Walmart does not carry left-handed can openers, spend the next 20 minutes of your afternoon voicing your displeasure to the assistant manager on duty. 

Click on the left hand to buy a left-handed can opener!

A hand is shown holding a pen, appearing to write on a piece of paper. The speech bubble says, "it was v hard to type out ths lettr with my pen left-handed. i hope that if i clickhere rightnow to buy a left-handed can opener for my left hand then opening cans will be much easyier but we hav to clickhere rn today to find out!" Additionally, there are large colorful arrows (one orange with a smiley face and another yellow pointing left) pointing towards the text, adding emphasis to the call to action.
Image by Adrian from Pixabay

A can opener is not going to open everything.

Keep in mind that not all products are distributed in cans, or at least the kind of cans that require a special opener to open. While some can openers are versatile, they are not miracle workers. If you’re looking for other ways to open pop-top soda cans, a can opener is not ideal. Ditto glass jars with lids.

The best can openers also feature bottle openers.

You’re going to want a beer to go with those baked beans on those lonely Friday nights. Rather than purchasing a separate bottle opener and have one more thing in your kitchen drawer, you can be more efficient and save space by purchasing a can opener than can serve more than one purpose. Many popular well-made models of can openers also feature bottle openers. Buying one ensures maximum usage value for your dollar. 

Electric can openers usually suck.

The first electric can opener was patented in 1931 and they have been pieces of crap ever since. They are unnecessary big and can take up precious kitchen counter real estate while usually requiring an electric outlet and they don’t work very well and they suck. Oddly enough, cheaper models are not that much more expensive than your standard quality manual can opener, but they tend to break easily so it’ll be pricier in the long run if you’re buying them over and over again. And that’s just want those fat cat electric can opener makers want you to do! There is no reason to own an electric can opener unless you really really really hate manual ones, have one or less hands, or if you collect them or something. 

The Best Can Openers On the Market!

Best Can Opener for Durability and Ease of Use: OXO SoftWorks

What you want is a good sturdy can opener with cushioned handles for your delicate hands to grip well and a big fat oversized knob for your slippery fingers to hold onto. It also shouldn’t cost more than $25 or so, give or take a few bucks. This particular OXO model scores a lot of points for its easy-to-use capabilities, smoothness, and durability — all good qualities one should be looking for in their can opener, and the folks at OXO are some of the best to ever get into the can-opening game. You can’t go wrong with this one.

Click on the can to buy a can opener!

The image shows a metal can without a label. A speech bubble from the can says, "ah shit my label done fell off an I for get what kinda food is inside me bc its been solong. clickhere now rightnow to purchase a can opener so we can find out what i have for u to eat!" The text humorously emphasizes the need to buy a can opener to reveal the mystery contents of the can.
Image by Damian Kaffenberger from Pixabay

Best Manual Can Opener for Functionality: The KitchenAid KC130OHOBA

You also can’t go wrong with this popular KitchenAid model, and there’s only so many features one needs in a good quality can opener. However, for extra peace of mind, this KitchenAid product comes with a one-year “hassle-free replacement and lifetime limited warranty,” so you sleep at night knowing the money you’ve invested in a can opener is protected, albeit for a limited time. Like other can openers of equal quality, users find the functionality effortless, and you would be hard-pressed to find a review that claims it does not actually open cans. If black is not your color, you can chose from a fancy palate of Aqua Sky, Ocean Drive, Pistachio, and varying shades of Red. Better yet, buy them all!

Click on the shelf of cans to buy a can opener!

The image depicts shelves filled with cans, each seemingly begging for release. One of the larger speech bubbles says, "we foods are traped inside us. wld u pls clickhere rightnow and buy a can opener today and free me and my frens!" Other smaller speech bubbles from nearby cans echo the same plea: "freeee us!", "yes pls free us!", and "thnk u. pls hurry." The image humorously anthropomorphizes the cans, giving them a sense of urgency as they await freedom through the purchase of a can opener.
Image by PublicDomainArchive from Pixabay


Best No-Frills Value: Made in USA Brand Can Opener

Really, you can’t go wrong with any well-reviewed can opener in the $9-$17 range, and this is yet another one. If you are not convinced by the company name, then maybe its packaging — which features an American flag, an advertisement for a long-gone cola brand, and Brooklyn Dodger great Duke Snider — will surely sell you on its USA-ness. It also comes in different-colored handles! Take advantage of the luxury of choices we have, and take your pick of black, blue, red, and white.

Click on the bald eagle to buy the can opener!

The image features a close-up of a bald eagle. A speech bubble coming from the eagle says, "hello my nam is a bald eagul. i am a symbol of merica. honor me and clickhere to buy a can opener that was made in teh U.S.A. rightnow! i said honor me and clickhere!" The text humorously plays on the idea of patriotism and the eagle's symbolic status, urging the viewer to buy a can opener made in the USA.
Image by WikiImages from Pixabay

Best Industrial Can Opener for Commercial Use: The Edlund 11100 Old Reliable

Want to know what a $150 can opener looks like? You won’t find the Edlund 11100 Old Reliable #1 in your neighbor’s kitchen, but you’ll see plenty of them in commercial-use kitchens, as well as in school and prison cafeterias across the country. Using this bad boy requires clamping the thingy to a strong-enough table, and pulling up the thing and placing a big-ass can underneath it so you can puncture it. Then you stab the can with a downward motion and turn the handle to crank the can all the way open. It’s a decent arm and shoulder workout. Yessir, the Edlund 11100 Old Reliable #1 is indeed number one and reliable for your industrial and commercial can-opening needs.

Click on the person to buy a big-ass can opener!

The image shows a woman sitting and looking slightly off to the side while holding a cup. She seems frustrated and is saying in the speech bubble: "why is takng my foood so long! does ths restaraunt not have a Edlund 11100 Old Reliable #1 manual can opener?? are u going to hav to clickhere yrself and buy it for them? today?? rightnow?? now?" The scene humorously suggests that the restaurant's delay is due to not having a proper can opener, prompting the viewer to take action.
Image by Kinga Dziwota from Pixabay

Best Electric Can Opener for Effortless and Safe Use: Hamilton Beach 76607 Smooth Touch Electric Automatic

If anyone has mastered the electric can opener, it’s the folks at Hamilton Beach. If you insist on actually spending money on an electric can opener, then this is the one you should get. It can handle those big-ass 28-ounce cans pretty well, which is especially useful to those who have a phobia about touching big cans. But as we’ve reiterated, electric can openers suck and tend to break easily, and Hamilton Beach are so confident in their product that they offer a warranty that lasts for one whole entire year.

Click on Ben Franklin to buy an electric can opener!

Image by sethink from Pixabay / wikimedia

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Cover Image Credit: Image by WikimediaImages from Pixabay


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